Cocoa Butter and Communion

Addressing generational trauma is essential to healing but accessing the wounds that need to be healed can be emotionally draining work. Psychotherapist Chioko Grevious communes with her village as they delve into the beauty, love and complexities of Black families, generational joy and trauma and their Black experiences. Each episode contains powerful and thought provoking conversations that can bring tears but will be a source of humor, love, connection and understanding. You will gain insight into, not only yourself but your own village, your family and the community surrounding you.

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Episodes

Tuesday Feb 21, 2023

I am back y'all! On this week's episode, I talk with the beautiful and fly Makeda Berhane. Makeda is the co-owner of the greatest coffee shop, Tiferet. She is also a beautiful human being with so much to share about her upbringing in central California, her origin, love, life, and family. She also discusses how her beautiful daughter changed her perspective. 
Makeda is currently listening to Leon Bridges and India Arie. 
Makeda is reading "Seven Days in June" by Tia Williams and "More than Enough: Claiming Space for Who You Are (No Matter What They Say)" by Elaine Welteroth
Follow the show on IG @cocoabutterandcommunion 
Visit the website to read the blog www.cocoabutterandcommunion.com 

Poetic Justice with J. Rowe

Wednesday Feb 08, 2023

Wednesday Feb 08, 2023

This week I catch up with J. Rowe (y'all will learn that I cannot call her by her government name). She is an educator and a poet and I am so glad that she stopped by the village to share about what she has been up to! This episode we talk about what happens when things fall apart, taking chances, and of course, boundaries. 
J. Rowe is currently reading Radical Dharma: Talking Race, Love, and Liberation by Rev. Angel Kyodo Williams, Lama Rod Owens, and Dr. Jasmine Syedullah 
I am reading things about personality development for school :) 
Follow J.Rowe on IG @Rowe.Writes  
Follow Cocoa Butter and Communion @cocoabutterandcommunion and check out the blog at www.cocoabutterandcommunion.com 
 
 
 

Wednesday Feb 01, 2023

There is no one better to talk about joy with than Dr. Malakai Coté. He exudes it. Many of us are feeling weighed down by Tyre Nichols' death, as well as the many before him. Many of us feel like we have to keep going. Is there a way that we can find our joy? How do we hold onto it when it doesn't feel like it is there? Dr. Coté discusses Black aliveness through joy and so much more. 
Malakai Coté, Ph.D. (he/him or they/them) is a licensed psychologist, clinical supervisor, and consultant whose therapeutic approaches rest in interconnection and fostering holistic healing. They earned their Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology from the University of Oregon. As a psychologist, Dr. Coté has worked in university counseling center settings and currently maintains an independent practice in the Greater Sacramento, CA area. He also clinically trains and supervises at the Gender Health Center in Sacramento, CA. They have taught graduate-level courses in clinical psychology at Alliant International University. Dr. Coté is a founding member and Secretary of the newly forming Greater Sacramento Association of Black Psychologists Chapter.
His ethic of care is rooted in African-centered and liberation psychology principles and values. He specializes in serving the diverse needs of Queer, Trans, Black, Indigenous, and Persons of Color across the lifespan. They have developed expertise in providing culturally specific and SGL/LGBTQ+ affirming mental health services. Beyond providing direct therapeutic experiences, they engage in program development and evaluation consultation services with community-based organizations. They also offer professional development and continuing education workshops addressing trans healthcare and the overall well-being of African/Black people. Dr. Coté is a trained yoga teacher, and they integrate gentle movement, meditation, and breathwork into their practice.
Dr. Coté was born and raised in Kansas in the United States. He proudly identifies as a descendant of the Mende peoples in present-day Sierra Leone who thrived before the Maafa and is committed to healing, resilience, and resting in our power. He is a spouse, guide parent, puppy parent, uncle, sibling, nephew, cousin, little, grand little, and adult child of two loving and hardworking parents with a solid extended kin core. They also happen to identify under the LGBTQ+ umbrella. He is an active member of Beta Gamma Chi Fraternity, Incorporated.
Dr. Coté turns to Opening to Spirit: Contacting the Healing Power of the Chakras and Honoring African Spirituality by Caroline Shola Arewa and he is currently reading Black Aliveness, Or A Poetics of Being by Kevin Everod Quashie. I am reading "Out of the Fire: Healing Black Trauma Caused by Systemic Racism Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy" by Jennifer Shepard Payne. 
Dr. Coté is listening to 90s hip hop and R&B (Jodeci, Dre, Snoop). 
 
 

Tuesday Jan 24, 2023

As Shawn Carter said, "Guess who's bizaack?" My bestie, Jessica has returned to the village with a headset y'all! This episode we talk about becoming intentional in our relationships, lessons learned in love and moving forward after heartbreak. 
The song that reminds Jessica of falling in love for the first time is Maxwell's "Whenever, Wherever, Whatever" and my picks were Donny Hathaway's music "Love, Love, Love" "A Song for You" and "You Were Meant For Me". 
The book that changed Jessica's perspective this past year was: "Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide for Reclaiming Yourself" by Nedra Glover Tawwab and my picks were "All About Love: New Visions" "Communion: The Female Search for Love" and "Salvation: Black People and Love" by the queen, bell hooks. 
Follow the show on IG @cocoabutterandcommunion
Send an email with thoughts to cocoabutterandcommunion@gmail.com
Check on the website that features a blog called "The Moisturizer" at www.cocoabutterandcommunion.com 
 

Talking Colorism with Ericka

Wednesday Jan 18, 2023

Wednesday Jan 18, 2023

This week's guest is a friend of the village, Dr. Ericka Burns is back y'all and this time we are talking colorism within our community. This is a topic of conversation that comes up indirectly and directly ALL the damn time so let's address it. 
Ericka is not doing a lot of reading these days (chile, she is busy and has too many books to choose from) but she is watching good television. She talks about her love for a Netflix show, Pressure Cooker. In addition to watching good, binge worthy television, she is listening to Megan Thee Stallion's "Plan B" and blocking haters' music from Tidal (did y'all know you can do that?)
I am reading "Gathering Blossoms Under Fire: The Journals of Alice Walker" and I mentioned trifflin' songs that are just...trifflin', those are "He's Mine" by MoKenStaf (cannot stand it) and "As We Lay" by Shirley Murdock (great song but still trifflin'). If you know of anymore artists that Ericka should block on Tidal, follow her on IG and let her know @drerickab
Make sure to follow the show on IG @cocoabutterandcommunion and check out the blog on www.cocoabutterandcommunion.com 
Enjoy the show. 

Checking In With My Son, Alex

Tuesday Jan 10, 2023

Tuesday Jan 10, 2023

My son, Alex drops by the podcast this week to talk about parenting, my style of parenting, having a village and music, of course. We share a lot of laughs, especially about his relationship with his dad. 
Alex is currently reading, "Stamped From the Beginning" by Dr. Ibram X. Kendi 
Chioko is reading "Ausomely Aaron" a children's illustrated book by Alexander Grevious (Yes!! This Alex!!). The book is about being on the spectrum and realizing that all of the things that made Aaron different were actually his superpowers. 
Alex's album of the year is Kendrick Lamar's "Mr. Morale and the Big Steppers" 
For more information about Alex's book, email me at cocoabutterandcommunion@gmail.com 
Follow the show on IG @cocoabutterandcommunion 
Visit the website at www.cocoabutterandcommunion.com there is a blog! 

Wednesday Jan 04, 2023

I know the topic of death and dying is scary. We don't like to talk about it or think about it. I wanted to talk to someone who helps people through this to plan for the future of their family. This week's episode, I am joined by my brother-in-law, David Grevious, to discuss what his idea of a good ancestor is and a particular way to prepare to be that good ancestor. David specializes in life insurance and he provides a personalized, knowledgable insight into providing what the folks need. We had a great discussion about changing careers, his alma mater, Howard University, life insurance and so much more. 
David is currently reading The LASER Fund: How to Diversify and Create the Foundation for a Tax Free Retirement and Meditations by Marcus Aurelius 
You can contact David at greviousd@hotmail.com (he shares why he loves the organization of hotmail) or you can call or text him at (678) 249-9171
 

Accessing a Cry Space

Tuesday Dec 27, 2022

Tuesday Dec 27, 2022

Happy all the things y'all. This week's guest is Erin Walker, she is the founder of The C.R.Y. Space. In June of last year, Erin lost her younger sister Jessica to a fentanyl overdose. Erin and I talk about how her grieving has found purpose. 
For more information about her organization, the C.R.Y. Space, contact her at couragereallyisyours@gmail.com 
Follow the show on IG @cocoabutterandcommunion 
I have a website!! www.cocoabutterandcommunion.com or drop me a line at cocoabutterandcommunion@gmail.com 
 

Tuesday Dec 20, 2022

Kevin Berthia stopped by the village to share his story of a suicide attempt, depression and what his life looks like now. We talk about his journey to the Golden Gate Bridge, the picture that captured his dark day and his mission to save others. Depression is not always darkness. Sometimes depression can look like the smiling face that greets you at your local coffee shop or your best friend that always has the tea and provides the great times.  Depression is real. Anxiety is real and suicide happens in our community. Suicide deaths are increasing among Black folks and the highest rate of death is among Black Americans aged 25-34 years of age. It is not weak to get help. It is not weak to talk to someone. You do not have to continue to push forward because it is within our culture to do so. 
To reach out to Kevin, get information about his speaking engagements or to donate to The Kevin Berthia Foundation, please go to his website www.kevinberthiafoundation.org
 

Tuesday Dec 13, 2022

This week's episode features the wonderful Mama Laiwah who is in these spiritual streets. She is a spiritist, spiritual counselor, a tarot reader, and an overall badass. She works with folks dealing with life’s daily crisis so if this is you, go ahead and contact her. Her work connects y'all to your inner power through the use of spiritual tools and by spiritual tools, she means tarot reading, spiritual baths/cleansing, candle work, incense work, meditation, prayer/affirmations and spiritual counseling. She is such a delight to work with and talk to! 
Mama Laiwah is reading "Prayers New and Old" (I learned that some of us are not praying right lol) 
Mama Laiwah is listening to Deon Cole spinning the 1s and 2s and Rahsaan Patterson 
I just paid for some Anita Baker tickets for NEXT YEAR (I thought the concert was this year) but it gives me something to look forward to :).
You can get more information about her and her work at www.mamalaiwah.com 
She is on the Tik Tok and the IG @mamalaiwah (she hosts a Sunday Check In on IG)  
You can schedule time with her at www.calendly.com/mamalaiwah
 

Chioko Grevious

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